Monday, April 18, 2011

Why I am doing this

I attended a great Beth Moore study at our Church last evening, we are studying" Esther, it is tough being a woman" Beth talked about transparency and that is why I feel the Lord calling me to do this . Also the challenge to document my weight lose on here was brought to me today and I am gonna take it, I am gonna be accountable to the Lord and write it out here for anyone whom it may help. He is my portion, so I want him to help control my eating and teach me to crave more of him and less of chocolate. And lots of other things too! It is not something I really want to do, but feel it is what God wants from me right now,it is not my usual.
I tend to hide behind a smile and laugh and pretend all is well with life, there is only  two people at Church who even know our struggles, I don't want pity, I am not asking for anything, though I must say as humbling as it was the food from Pastor and Suzi, was such a blessing and so much help. It seems so much easier to tell this way then face to face, and I am not even sure anyone reads maybe that is why God wants it this way to just get me ready.
As it says in Hebrews 11:6b "The Lord is my helper: I will not be afraid . What can man do to me?" I have spent my life worrying about what people think, it is time to only be concerned with what the Lord thinks.
  These are big steps for me and I am excited to see how the Lord directs them and what he does through them. Oh how I pray it is fruitful.

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