Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Feeling Stronger

The LORD is my strength and song, and he is become my salvation: he is my God, and I will prepare him an habitation; my father's God, and I will exalt him. Exodus 15:2

Feeling stronger and less guilty about needing to take care of myself, I have had 2 major surgeries in the last 6 months . I had both to end medical problems and lead a more productive life, in hoping  to be able to do more for the Lord. I know I am in love with the Lord with all my heart, soul, mind and strength, and rejection has been a big issue for me all my life, and I have dealt with it allot, but talking to our therapist this morning I realised that ,Jesus is everything to me, so to be rejected in the area of someone saying I did not hear from him, and was unforgivable, was such a blow and with not feeling well, and continued rejection in a small setting , where I have tried to show kindness, I still smile at these folks and greet them with a good morning or hello, It is hard to have someone completely ignore you like you are something less then anyone else. And I still to this very day am not sure what I have really done, I just want unity and I do believe that is what Jesus wants to .. Plus I want others to know Him, He is returning and asked us to go and tell others, to love the Lord and to love your neighbor. He told us to love, and I so do love loving on people and helping them and serving. It is my makeup and I do not need to be sorry for that. I need to continue growing in Christ, cause I do believe we are never done, and I need to be the healthiest me I can to go through allot of the things in our lives right now. And I do so believe, Jesus is directing us and holding us through all this and He is so strong enough, Oh what a comfort to know I am not alone, He is holding me and loving me and believes in me and wants me and will continue to use me, as I allow Him to. I am not a religious person, I am in a relationship for a life time, with an awesome faithful Father!
We need to move, we have children going through trials, and they need us and JESUS, and we have a new grandson to be making his appearance soon who will need us. If I look at all this it is lots, but I know we will make it and we will grow together even closer cause we do love each other and are devoted to the heavenly Father.
I have forgiven, and I know I need not care what others think, and I will keep working on that , but God also uses things to move us on, and maybe this was just His way to get our direct attention to real prayer of where we should be.
For now, I need to finish healing this back, and keep healing and learning to live with my new stomach, and continue in relationship with the one and only living God.
Yes things are His, He will make all things right in his time. For He is God and is good all the time.

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