Friday, March 2, 2012

Not a cure but a tool.

This surgery in no way "cures' me of being over weight, severely overweight at that. It is a tool to help me though and one I am thankful I had the choice to have.
I so admire those who have lost 100 pounds and more with out having to do something like this. But for me it was and is the right thing.
I am still learning to eat slow enough, the small amounts are not a problem, but there are mental hunger issues, like seeing a good protein commercial, my head likes subway. my stomach right now way could not do it. But it is an area I am working on, learning to take every thought captive.
The spiritual journey of all this with the physical has been such an awesome time for me.
Has it been hard??? Heck ya, I had pain, I had an infection, and allergic reaction that made me want to itch my skin off, but what did I learn, I learned that my God is so big, He was there through it all holding me and comforting me, and preparing me and getting me through, He has helped me take my thoughts and keep them on Him, and on the goal. Not on me, or things going on around me, I have had to say no to stresses that usually I would of caved to, for fear of not making someone happy. But I am learning to be the best me I must take care of me. There is so much I want to do for the Lord, and I need to be ready and healthy and willing.
So I am setting a timer when I eat to make sure I am taking enough time to eat, If I go to fast I get some heartburn, and once even vomited, not fun, especially since it was only several bites, but it is important to learn to slow down.... I am a lets get it done and do it right girl, and this I can do right, but boy oh boy, do I need to take my time to get it done.
I am getting in 48oz of liquid a day in between meals , plus the protein shake so right now it feels as though all I am doing is eating or drinking. There is increased energy though, as I am not as tired during the day and am sleeping so much better at night . At each hurdle I get over I see the good.
I know this is not for everyone and I so respect that, and in no way would I ever push or encourage some one to do it with out really really looking into it and taking their time to think it through and get to talk to others and their Dr's first.
I have been blessed to have this working for me. And feel it was how my life is suppose to be right now , right here where I am at.
I am so blessed with so much support and encouragement, man oh man, the friends and family have been amazing to say the least.
This morning I am thanking the Lord for this journey in life and so thankful He walks with me.

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